Tag: truth

Dance with Me

“Let em come, the storms, the rain. Let them blow and shake, rattle and flash. These feet will not move, I will lean into the fray and dance in the chaos. I am built for enduring all that can be thrown at me. See me here, still, and listen to the sky tremble.” // Tyler Knott

I’m dancing in the rain. This has been, to put it lightly, a whirlwind of a week, month, year. So here I am on the road again, endlessly discovering myself and my purpose. Refocused and ready to find clarify through this mayhem.

I have always said that time is merely a concept and for reasons that I cannot explain, life will turn to us at any given moment and say “time to put this chapter to rest, lets write an even better one.” So that is what we do, because at the end of the day I think it is safe to say we all know and understand that pain in never permanent.

One day, one decision, one brave moment; that is all it took. I sincerely believe that we have to take risks in order to learn hard life lessons. It isn’t always easy and I promise you that no matter how much you try, you will never be prepared for whatever the outcome is. I tried to protect and prepare myself for all possibilities: it was not enough. There are some things that we just cannot feel until we are in the moment as it is unraveling. Bittersweet and coated with anxiety. When it happened I thought the answer was to gulp the pain and avoid making others suffer. I put myself in a position that I perceived as weak. Thank-you to my friend who reminded me that taking a chance is brave and I should be proud – no matter the aftermath.

There is no growth in comfort. We grow most as a result of the painful and challenging times. This life is not a matter of win or lose – it is a matter of learning. If there is one lesson I encourage people to embrace in their own hardships, it is that you should never reject your instinct. Trust it. Look within and follow your gut – it is leading you somewhere. Be mindful of yourself. What is meant to be will be. I truly believe that some things are meant to stay while others are destined to leave. It is dangerous to count on someone else with your heart and soul. However it’s a risk we take and I’ll tell you one thing – it’s always worth it. People do not want that pressure; it scares them but we do it anyways; often times surprising ourselves with how much we are capable of. So be your own foundation and seek support from friends and family. They are your home team; they are your #1.

When you are facing times in your lives where you are hurt by circumstances you cannot control, take the chance that life is giving you to heal. When one door closes, many doors open.

So until then, dance with me in the rain.

 

Head up, heart strong.

 

10 Ways to be Mindful & Present

Time is the most precious thing you are offered in this life. You are constantly moving from one moment to the next. Stand still for a second; appreciating how much bigger this world is than just your day-to-day routine. Begin to practice the art of being aware and mindful of yourself, loved ones and others. This is my advice to you on how to be more mindful and present.

1. Stay true to your word. Follow through with your actions.

2. Be vulnerable and forgiving. Seek closure if you need to.

3. Understand that you are going to need to build walls between you and certain people. Some are never going to be willing to climb that high. Wish them well and send them on their way. For those who do climb, express your appreciation.

4. In life you are going to come across people who you are instantly connected with on a deeper, soulful level. Those people are going to change your life. Embrace, explore and cherish those relationships.

5. Keep every situation in perspective. Take a moment to yourself if you need to.

6. Apologize when you do something wrong – intentional or not. Own up to your mistakes.

7. Be honest with people – especially those you love and are loved by. One day they will thank you for telling them the hard truth. No one will ever thank you for being a liar.

8. There is always more than meets the naked eye. Everyone is fighting their own battles that you know nothing about.

9. Anger is a burden too heavy to bear. Redirect your energies. Send light to the person who you are hurt by.

10. You are never going to have all of the answers. That’s cool though. Smile at the chaos and laugh at the confusion.

Head up, heart strong.

Soul Mantra

To have a positive mind and a hopeful heart. That is how I am choosing each day to build my life rather than just merely living.

A soul mantra is simply a word or phrase that sets our intention for each day. A soul mantra is a compilation of various components:

  • Knowing Yourself
  • Mind, Body, Spirit
  • Knowing Others

Knowing Yourself

Here is my advice to you: Choose to immerse yourself in your own world and get into your head. Do not live in fear of the future or in the pain of the past. Get comfortable with yourself. Enjoy your own company and solitude. Be confident. Be proud of who you are. Be humble. Understand your strengths and your weaknesses.

When you make the decision to set your dreams and goals in motion you place yourself on the path to becoming the person you most want to be. You allow yourself to seek new experiences as well as good vibes and idiosyncratic thoughts all of which encourage you to grow. When you understand yourself, you learn to better understand others.

In the words of my friend Aaron Patterson, “I’m more comfortable with the fact that the moves I make are bringing me closer to my purpose.”

Mind, Body, Spirit

Life is about making conscious decisions to nourish both your body and soul with the right elements to help you stay strong and healthy. Your heart and soul is the very essence of your being.

Start by stepping back and gaining some perspective. Sometimes when we are too close to something or someone, we are unable to maintain a healthy perspective. Take the time to seek clarity. Many times we know that there are toxic habits or people in our lives and they can be all consuming so we think that they are contributing to our lives – we’re wrong.

Work on replacing bad habits with good ones. Remove people. You do not need to explain yourself. Accept that these people or habits have been a significant part of your life but that they may be hindering your growth. You will be in awe at the things that come to you when you open space for healthier things; sometimes things you didn’t even imagine possible.

Knowing Others

Aforementioned, seek new experiences as well as good vibes and idiosyncratic thoughts. Take the time to connect with like-minded peers but also subject yourself to individuals who have different perspectives and ways of thinking – you could learn something invaluable.

Open up conversation. Be an intellectual. Share your outlooks. Engage in the conversation and observe. You don’t always need to be the one talking; “listen with the intent to understand, not solely with the intent to reply.” Be genuine. We are in a generation where people are driven by money, status and especially ego. So open up a little bit, talk about passion and purpose, art and sports, likes and dislikes.

Discuss what inspires you on your best days and what motivates you on your hardest ones. 

Soul Mantra

Give out what you most want to come back because beauty and truth surrounds us. Be conscious of the energy you emit and connect with. 

Be with people whose company you enjoy as much or more than your solitude. Whether it’s grabbing a drink, relaxing at a coffee shop, exploring a new city or sitting on the couch at home. Make connections to souls aligned with yours. You will find that encouragement, inspiration and happiness come easy with these people. These are the ones that will contribute to the quality of your life. 

Sending positivity and peace to you all.

Dark Realities

An emotionally dark place is accompanied by pain, fear, and even stages of numbness. It is a cold and lonely road. In my darkest times I have always turned to my writing. But for the first time, no amount of my words felt as if they would be powerful enough to shed light on overwhelming circumstances. I had complete writers block. Until yesterday, when it was someone else’s words that resonated with me. My friend said to me, “sometimes it’s good to release the sad, we can’t be truly happy if we don’t let ourselves express our sorrows,” he continued, “your words will come to you.” He reminded me why it was words that I always turned to. My writing brings me peace. “I write to hold on. I write to let go. I write because I am a firm believer that we do not have to go through things alone – the good and the bad.” Thank you, Isiah, for reminding me of that.

  • misfortune: (n) an unfortunate condition or event
  • sorrow: (n)  a feeling of deep distress caused by loss, disappointment, or other misfortune suffered by oneself or others.

We all have our own problems or experiences that cause pain. Through my years I have learned that no experience or problem can be compared or classified as big or small. Our sadness derives from the fact that the situation at hand is close to our hearts and who or what it is matters to us, to our souls. Everyone is different. We all carry the weight of our sorrows in our own ways. Personally, I choose to suffer in silence. As a woman who is very used to being the strong and independent one, it is hard to be completely vulnerable to others. But I am trying to learn that being vulnerable isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s merely human. So, tonight, I write with a heavy heart and a bit of vulnerability.

We make sacrifices for the people we love. We give away a little bit of our hearts and ourselves to everyone that we truly love, all the while having faith that the space we clear will be filled in return. Unfortunately, that is not always the case. Sometimes we are making space for others and when it is not filled we are left with a feeling of emptiness. It is an emptiness that can consume a part of your heart, leaving a void that cannot be filled. There are no promises in love. There is no written contract that states that if you generously give your time, energy and love to other people that they too must return it. It is not how life works. I’ve learned that the hard way – more than once; and I am sure that I will experience it many more times throughout my life. Sometimes our love is not enough to make people stay. 

Maybe this is true. That there are some of us who give love and some of us who take love; and that those who give can’t help giving just as those who take can’t help taking; and maybe this is what holds the world in balance. [Chris Abani]

Unedited.

We are always learning something new about ourselves. Sometimes the days pass us by and we don’t even realize that we’re understanding new aspects of who we are. Then there are the rare but truly remarkable moments – an instant that washes over us and suddenly we feel as if we have a little more clarity on who we are. I love those moments. I embrace them.

I write quite often about being “lost.” If you have read my previous posts, then you know that I do not associate the feeling of being lost with negativity. Frankly, I think it is a rather useful feeling as we are each going about our own journeys. As I get older and the road gets windier, instead of seeking answers, I find myself asking more questions. The questions are endless and the roads that lead to the answers are nothing short of complex. 

I am a creature of habit. I have always loved routine. I like plans and stability. But, my soul disagrees. In my young adulthood, I am learning day-in and day-out that familiar is beginning to scare me. I am finding a real sense of discomfort and unhappiness in the familiar aspects of my life. My days have begun to feel filled with familiar faces; but ones that lack consistency, loyalty, honesty and sincerity. These are merely just words on a screen but within them lies significant power and meaning. The familiar faces I am surrounded by are starting to be associated with heartbreak, distrust and ingenuity. I do not mean that these people are all specifically treating me with a lack of these virtues but they lack them in the way they treat themselves and others throughout their daily lives. It is terrible and heartbreaking.

This matter leads me to my next point. I do not know who I am in entirety but I have a great sense of independence and will to find out. I soothe my soul through writing and I feed my soul through love and exploration.

“My heart wants roots and my mind wants wings”

Aforementioned, I recently had my own moment of clarity. It was a brief moment, but one thats wake is still washing over me. My moment was well balanced as I was in an unknown city accompanied by a most familiar face. My best friend. An extraordinary human. One who speaks and lives out the virtues of consistency, loyalty, honesty and sincerity. She inspires me.

I am passionate and most inspired by ideas, attitudes and experiences. The unfamiliar excites me and traveling entices me. Traveling holds promises of worldly experience and the opportunity to continually grow and learn about myself and the wonderful things this world has to offer. I do not travel to escape, I travel to capture the very moments that I am in. I travel because when I am in an unfamiliar place or circumstance, I am the most of who I want to be.

I hope that one day I can meet someone and together we can make the most of our moments – big and small. We can travel and ask questions together. But just as I am not seeking answers, I am not going to seek for the right company. Throughout my individual journey and experiences, I am sure that I will stumble upon all the humans that are meant to be in my life, and stay. I smile at the very thought of that day.

In closing, I do not have any answers, wise advice or main point to share with you all today. Everything I just shared with you was raw and unedited. I do not have any of the answers, but I do intend to continue asking questions. So for now, I leave you all with this:

If you’re feeling lost, that is okay. If you do not have the answers, that is okay. Hold onto the moments and the people that make you feel alive. Be present with them.

“The gift of presence is a rare and beautiful gift. To come – unguarded, undistracted – and be fully present, fully engaged with whoever we are with at the moment.”