Tag: ordinary

Twenty – You

2020

A new decade. 

Any day can be the day we start something fresh or close a chapter of our lives, but to me there is something invigorating and magical surrounding this time of the year. It’s a time to realign ourselves – to become even more of who and what we want to be.

Happy New Year. 

This platform is a space I created so I could be authentically and unashamedly myself. I share it with all of you because my writing is a process I use to organize the chaos in my soul and heal my spirit. If it resonates with or can help any one of you feel understood, not alone or better able to connect with someone then my purpose of sharing my thoughts is fulfilled.

That being said, I cannot muster up enough words (even for me – hard to believe, I know) to articulate the immense sense of gratitude I feel that you are taking time out of your day to read the pieces I write. If you’ve been with me since the beginning of twentysomethingchronicles or have entrusted me with your time along the way, I thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you for entering into this sacred space with me.

“Just because I carry it all so well doesn’t mean it’s not heavy.”

Over the last year, my life was uprooted in more ways than one and my heart just ached with grief and fear of the future. Let me tell you something – grief and fear are one hell of a toxic combination. The anger, confusion, emptiness and emotions attached are intense. My heart felt as if it had weakened. My confidence diminished and I found myself losing sight of who I was and what direction to go in. It brought me to a place where I needed to reevaluate who and what aligns with the life I strive to create for myself. Whether it be staying complacent in any aspect of our lives or harnessing relationships with the wrong people, the universe works overtime to make us uncomfortable when our growth is being hindered.

I feel incredibly grateful for the unwavering love, support and guidance from the people I am surrounded by in my life. The people who saw the darkness overpowering my soul+spirit and refused to jump ship. These individuals are the people you instinctively cherish the most because they are the ones who love you with the same conviction as you love them, even in the moments when you can only show up in pieces. It was also in my harder times when I was introduced to some new incredibly special people. By embracing our vulnerabilities we were able to connect openly, honestly and create bonds because we saw each other through the lens of compassion.

Throughout all of this, I learned some really important lessons. Release the people who took a piece of you, your heart or your spirit. The pain they ensued was merely a reflection of them; the pain does not define who you are or your worth. You are the ONLY ONE who defines your worth. And please, do not allow the hurt to inhibit you from opening up to new people and allowing yourself to be seen as all that you are. The people meant for you will embrace you, love you and fill your life with joy and I promise you this – it will be reciprocated.

“This is your life. And if you want to change it, the first step is realizing that you’ve had the power all along.”

No one can build your life for you and you must remember that YOU (and only you) have power over what the narrative to your story is going to sound and feel like. Please know that the healing process is not linear. Some days just being able to say to yourself, “I am exactly where I need to be and I am doing the best I can do right here, right now” is enough.

The only person you can rely on showing up day in and day out for you is yourself. Show up for yourself. This is your journey and there is no right or wrong way of traveling it. Our lives are not one-size-fits-all.

Connect with your truth – what are your core values? 

Determine them. Show up for them. Be loyal to them.

These shape your behaviors and ultimately your habits. When you are aligned with these values, they dictate your day-to-day. As they say, “you can’t just talk the talk, you must walk the walk.” And as a result, you authentically love yourself. You are proud of the life you are cultivating. And you will no longer be a prisoner of other people’s judgments or malicious actions.

“The most important relationship you are ever going to have is the one you hold with yourself.”

A loving reminder from me to you – your powers come from within.

Head up, heart strong.

Magic

You don’t have to fear the darkness

Light yourself up

a flickering flame

in the home of your own soul.

And don’t you allow your heart to crack

at the hands of others

bitter words,

cold actions,

silence.

Toughen your exterior

heighten your criteria.

Not everyone should be 

granted access to your energy.

You are as pure as they come

so fuck the masses.

Cultivate your own chaos

rather than carrying the

weight of others.

You mustn’t lose

your madness,

baby   –

you are magic.

✴

Blazing Truths

What drives you?

Your pain or your compassion?

I ask this question with strong intent to understand people on a deeper level. Our hearts and minds can be messy. It’s important to communicate openly and honestly with one another about where we’ve been, where we’re at and the direction in which we want to go. Yes, that requires vulnerability – something many of us shy away from. But vulnerability allows us to be seen and heard. It is the ability to open up our hearts to one another, provide a sense of belonging and remind each other that we are worthy even if our scars have made us feel like we are not.

Each experience gives us a voice, even if it shakes. Speak your truth and be authentically yourself.  I can guarantee you will never look back and regret standing proud in who you are. If we are willing to do that then we can intentionally make our mark on the lives of those who we connect with. Time is a fickle thing so be bold in who and how you love. Whether it is short-lived or long-winded, we must speak blazing truths and indulge in divine chemistry with one another. Stay in your magic– the world truly needs it.

Head up, heart strong.

Ordinary Happiness.

I believe that the most delightful moments are the small, nameless ones.

  • Sharing a warm smile 
  • When someone you love wraps their arms around you from behind
  • Admiring a sunset or sunrise
  • Hearing a laugh
  • Locking eyes with someone
  • Basking in the warm sun

The list goes on and on…

These are truly the moments our lives should be about. The moments that make us feel something. The small ones that make up our everyday lives, but are often overlooked. These moments hold such significance – at least to me. I have always been an admirer of “the little things.” Call me an old soul, but I find beauty and happiness in the most ordinary, simple times that life has to offer. Have you ever hugged someone, and they squeezed you just a little bit tighter or held you for just a moment longer? Have you found yourself smiling simply because someone or something came to mind? Do you feel at peace when you look at something breathtakingly beautiful – a sunset, a mountain, a smiling child, someone you love, a stranger?

In the chaos of our everyday lives, it is important to remember these moments. To appreciate how the ordinary can be extraordinary. I share these thoughts with you all today because I have recently taken some time to appreciate these moments. More often than not, we do not take the time to appreciate what makes us happy until a tragedy, a loss or a pain has struck – leaving us in a wake of longing to take moments of happiness back. When we lose someone – the first thing we do is ponder those small, nameless moments we shared with them. We pull out pictures and old writings. Those ordinary times are suddenly cherished; treasures of memory that we hold close to us for comfort.

I encourage you to be aware of the nameless moments that fill your everyday lives. Adore them. I trust that we can all value the significance of our nameless, happy moments. I can only wish that you are benefiting from these moments before they are gone. But just remember, the small nameless moments make up our everyday lives. So if one moment is gone, another one will come.