Tag: experience

Dance with Me

“Let em come, the storms, the rain. Let them blow and shake, rattle and flash. These feet will not move, I will lean into the fray and dance in the chaos. I am built for enduring all that can be thrown at me. See me here, still, and listen to the sky tremble.” // Tyler Knott

I’m dancing in the rain. This has been, to put it lightly, a whirlwind of a week, month, year. So here I am on the road again, endlessly discovering myself and my purpose. Refocused and ready to find clarify through this mayhem.

I have always said that time is merely a concept and for reasons that I cannot explain, life will turn to us at any given moment and say “time to put this chapter to rest, lets write an even better one.” So that is what we do, because at the end of the day I think it is safe to say we all know and understand that pain in never permanent.

One day, one decision, one brave moment; that is all it took. I sincerely believe that we have to take risks in order to learn hard life lessons. It isn’t always easy and I promise you that no matter how much you try, you will never be prepared for whatever the outcome is. I tried to protect and prepare myself for all possibilities: it was not enough. There are some things that we just cannot feel until we are in the moment as it is unraveling. Bittersweet and coated with anxiety. When it happened I thought the answer was to gulp the pain and avoid making others suffer. I put myself in a position that I perceived as weak. Thank-you to my friend who reminded me that taking a chance is brave and I should be proud – no matter the aftermath.

There is no growth in comfort. We grow most as a result of the painful and challenging times. This life is not a matter of win or lose – it is a matter of learning. If there is one lesson I encourage people to embrace in their own hardships, it is that you should never reject your instinct. Trust it. Look within and follow your gut – it is leading you somewhere. Be mindful of yourself. What is meant to be will be. I truly believe that some things are meant to stay while others are destined to leave. It is dangerous to count on someone else with your heart and soul. However it’s a risk we take and I’ll tell you one thing – it’s always worth it. People do not want that pressure; it scares them but we do it anyways; often times surprising ourselves with how much we are capable of. So be your own foundation and seek support from friends and family. They are your home team; they are your #1.

When you are facing times in your lives where you are hurt by circumstances you cannot control, take the chance that life is giving you to heal. When one door closes, many doors open.

So until then, dance with me in the rain.

 

Head up, heart strong.

 

Expressions of Gratitude

My words, written and spoken, come from a place deeply rooted in my heart and soul. A great deal of my work is about understanding the aching, demanding, chaotic and confusing moments that we endure; viewing them in a favorable manner. I try to make sense of my  world, and share it with all of you because there’s a little bit of sunshine, even on the rainiest days.  

I am passionate about life. I wholeheartedly believe that love can heal all. That is why my mission is to spread as much love as I can.

As a human, I am so flawed. But my soul, man. My soul is so genuine and whole that it could light up the darkest room. That is why I am here. I want to help light up the darkest parts of your lives.

It is easy to talk about the bad things. The things that make us hurt, angry or frustrated. But today I want to talk about gratitude. Expressing our gratitude is vital to our well-being and joy.

Grat·i·tude : the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

Yesterday, when I was experiencing some anxiety, my gracious friend Natalie stood in front of me and told me to list 10 things that I was grateful for. In my hazy mindset I started to think. I did not want to list just any 10 things; I wanted them to count. As I began telling her the things I was grateful for, I felt more grounded. The haze lifted and I smiled. I am thankful that Natalie invited me to take a moment to reflect upon the things that make my heart full. Her approach inspired me and I wanted to share it with all of you because I think it will inspire you too.

I encourage you to take 30, 60, or 90 seconds out of your day to list 10 things that you are grateful for. Share them with someone. It will spread a positive light. It is a small act of kindness to yourself and to others. Let’s say thank-you and cultivate full hearts. It’ll be worth it, I promise.

Thank you for reading my words and for adding passion and purpose into my life.

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.” // Melody Beattie

Head up, heart strong.

 

10 Ways to be Mindful & Present

Time is the most precious thing you are offered in this life. You are constantly moving from one moment to the next. Stand still for a second; appreciating how much bigger this world is than just your day-to-day routine. Begin to practice the art of being aware and mindful of yourself, loved ones and others. This is my advice to you on how to be more mindful and present.

1. Stay true to your word. Follow through with your actions.

2. Be vulnerable and forgiving. Seek closure if you need to.

3. Understand that you are going to need to build walls between you and certain people. Some are never going to be willing to climb that high. Wish them well and send them on their way. For those who do climb, express your appreciation.

4. In life you are going to come across people who you are instantly connected with on a deeper, soulful level. Those people are going to change your life. Embrace, explore and cherish those relationships.

5. Keep every situation in perspective. Take a moment to yourself if you need to.

6. Apologize when you do something wrong – intentional or not. Own up to your mistakes.

7. Be honest with people – especially those you love and are loved by. One day they will thank you for telling them the hard truth. No one will ever thank you for being a liar.

8. There is always more than meets the naked eye. Everyone is fighting their own battles that you know nothing about.

9. Anger is a burden too heavy to bear. Redirect your energies. Send light to the person who you are hurt by.

10. You are never going to have all of the answers. That’s cool though. Smile at the chaos and laugh at the confusion.

Head up, heart strong.

Head Up, Heart Strong

Tonight I come to you unguarded. From the goodness in my heart and soul, I want to share a story with you.

Some years ago I was asked to identify five negative traits that I thought I possessed. “Easy”, I thought, “people are telling me all the time things that are wrong with me, they say…”

“You don’t have the right body”

“You’re too emotional & sensitive”

“You’re too smart – it’s intimidating”

“You’re too nice”

“You think too much”

I think I spewed those off in about 30-60 seconds flat. “The list could go on, but you said to only list five.” Following my response, they asked me to name five of my best traits. “Shit…well, uhm…” 

“I like my eyes, I definitely have pretty eyes”

“I have a big heart too”

“That’s it, that’s all I got.”

I look back in hindsight and I think to myself, “REALLY ANNA, THAT’S ALL YOU GOT?”

But at the time that really was all I had. I had been so drastically affected by the judgements of others that I couldn’t identify my worth. They had also become my own judgements of myself. Turns out as we get older, those judgements only become more frequent, harsh and wait for it …. familiar. I’ve heard it all before. There is such a thing as constructive criticism and then there is destructive criticism. Be mindful.

As I have grown, I have also become more self-aware. The things that people identified as my weaknesses turn out to be my greatest strengths and attributes. I wear them proudly like a girl scout does her badges. More significantly, I learned that being unapologetically myself is brave and beautiful. I am flawed and I embrace that. I myself, and myself only, determine my strength and weaknesses.

That moment comes back to me every time someone passes judgement on my physical, mental or emotional state. It is a gentle reminder that I am doing something right. Life is about growth and there is no growth in comfort. You grow in moments when your patience and endurance are being tested. Experiences disguised as setbacks are usually not setbacks at all, but stepping stones that put you ahead.

I feel that a lot of us have felt or do feel lost at times; free and lonely. I understand this. I have an old soul. I believe that the way I perceive the world is different. I could never make sense of it until I began to focus on my truest self. I began making connections between my relationships and my energy. I established my goals and ambitions. You can work on yourself – there is always room for improvement, in the best way.

I have said before that I think self-love and self-awareness are important. We should be comfortable alone. But it is not that cut and dry. I encourage you to expand your heart, mind and soul through friendships, exposure and vast knowledge of the unknown. Personally, that’s my kind of thrill.

Every interaction allows us to react – to think, feel and be. We do not have to have it all figured out. Life is deeper than what we see on the surface. I strongly believe that there are some things we need to work out alone. I also strongly feel that people have forgotten or don’t understand at all how beautiful it is to build and witness progression together – conquering life’s obstacles as a team. People have far too much pride and ego. They think that being vulnerable is a sign of weakness when it truly is a great testament to strength. Do not be so busy feeding your ego that you forget to feed your soul. 

Allowing myself to be open and honest has given me the chance to cultivate relationships and embrace bonds with people that I would have otherwise missed out on if I let fear of risk or rejection get in the way. We do not know what the future holds. We are never certain of our outcomes. If we did and if we were, life would be predictable and we would all be bored and stagnant.

Please be mindful of your thoughts and self-talk. Define your intentions and stop ignoring your intuitions. I encourage you to have the confidence to step out of your comfort zone. Fight for what you love and please be unapologetically yourself.

Head up, heart strong.

The Tides of Life

13552728_10206545989748558_2111440664_nWriting is my thing. Words are my love language, my outlet to freely express. They are my security and they are my escape. Words are the strings that connect hearts and souls. I am excited to expand my world with you through this new versatile platform. Welcome to twentysomethingchronicles.com!

The phrase “ebb and flow” was referenced to me today and it sparked something in this jumbled mind of mine to write about. I am most at peace when surrounded by water. I find tranquility as I sit on the dock with my toes in the lake or when I am sitting on the beach, watching the planes take off as the sun sets on the horizon. I feel a calmness cast over me just describing it.

Ebb and flow relate to the two phases of the tide.

  • Ebb: the outgoing phase – when the tide drains away from the shore
  • Flow: the incoming phase – when the water rises again

Each phase symbolizing the tides of our lives. Change is the only constant. You will rise and you will fall.

The outgoing phase moves you away from things that are not good for your soul. Like the ocean, leading you to larger, deeper waters. Scary at first, but as you move with the tides you nourish your soul. In this stage, which happens again and again throughout your journey, you will find that you are leaving places and people that you once considered home. Emotionally and physically you fade away from the security of the shore.  But if you move in rhythm, you will not drown in the riptides but rather you will learn to flow with the waves. This phase will allow you to move forward with each new day. Going from one place to another, moving steadily. Living in progression rather than regression.

The ebbs and flow of my journey over the last six months have been one hell of a ride. Rising and crashing against the shore, over and over again. As I aspire to inspire, I am learning to be mindful. Mindful of my intuition, my thoughts, feelings, and actions. Each wave is a new lesson. Some harder than others. But I learned that staying in the shallow end (our comfort zone) did more harm than good. The deep waters are where I want to be. The understanding I have of myself and the journey I am on allows me to grow and be more intuitive to both my soul and the souls of those whom I keep close to my heart. The ebbs and flow don’t allow me to harness hate in my heart. Rather they give me the ability to accept my circumstances and the things that are out of my control which is liberating.

People come into our lives constantly, some stay and others will leave and never return. The flux of people coming in and out of my life has always been challenging for me because I fall in love with peoples souls. That was until I realized that I have the power over who I allow to take up space in my life. Guard your space fiercely, be generous but be intentional about who you allow in. When you do this, you have expectations and standards for the individuals you graciously share your ocean with. Each moving in rhythm to your own ebbs and flow and if you are lucky you will beautifully crash and rise together. You will find that this allows yourself and others to add magic to this time in your life. I hope you embrace the moments when you are drawn away from the shore and immersed into rising water.

“Her soul was too deep to explore by those who always swam in the shallow end” (A.J. Lawless).

Soul Mantra

To have a positive mind and a hopeful heart. That is how I am choosing each day to build my life rather than just merely living.

A soul mantra is simply a word or phrase that sets our intention for each day. A soul mantra is a compilation of various components:

  • Knowing Yourself
  • Mind, Body, Spirit
  • Knowing Others

Knowing Yourself

Here is my advice to you: Choose to immerse yourself in your own world and get into your head. Do not live in fear of the future or in the pain of the past. Get comfortable with yourself. Enjoy your own company and solitude. Be confident. Be proud of who you are. Be humble. Understand your strengths and your weaknesses.

When you make the decision to set your dreams and goals in motion you place yourself on the path to becoming the person you most want to be. You allow yourself to seek new experiences as well as good vibes and idiosyncratic thoughts all of which encourage you to grow. When you understand yourself, you learn to better understand others.

In the words of my friend Aaron Patterson, “I’m more comfortable with the fact that the moves I make are bringing me closer to my purpose.”

Mind, Body, Spirit

Life is about making conscious decisions to nourish both your body and soul with the right elements to help you stay strong and healthy. Your heart and soul is the very essence of your being.

Start by stepping back and gaining some perspective. Sometimes when we are too close to something or someone, we are unable to maintain a healthy perspective. Take the time to seek clarity. Many times we know that there are toxic habits or people in our lives and they can be all consuming so we think that they are contributing to our lives – we’re wrong.

Work on replacing bad habits with good ones. Remove people. You do not need to explain yourself. Accept that these people or habits have been a significant part of your life but that they may be hindering your growth. You will be in awe at the things that come to you when you open space for healthier things; sometimes things you didn’t even imagine possible.

Knowing Others

Aforementioned, seek new experiences as well as good vibes and idiosyncratic thoughts. Take the time to connect with like-minded peers but also subject yourself to individuals who have different perspectives and ways of thinking – you could learn something invaluable.

Open up conversation. Be an intellectual. Share your outlooks. Engage in the conversation and observe. You don’t always need to be the one talking; “listen with the intent to understand, not solely with the intent to reply.” Be genuine. We are in a generation where people are driven by money, status and especially ego. So open up a little bit, talk about passion and purpose, art and sports, likes and dislikes.

Discuss what inspires you on your best days and what motivates you on your hardest ones. 

Soul Mantra

Give out what you most want to come back because beauty and truth surrounds us. Be conscious of the energy you emit and connect with. 

Be with people whose company you enjoy as much or more than your solitude. Whether it’s grabbing a drink, relaxing at a coffee shop, exploring a new city or sitting on the couch at home. Make connections to souls aligned with yours. You will find that encouragement, inspiration and happiness come easy with these people. These are the ones that will contribute to the quality of your life. 

Sending positivity and peace to you all.

With Gratitude

Hello lovely,

As we approach this holiday season and the year end, I want to take a moment and thank each and every one of you who takes the time to read my work. It was just a mere eight months ago that I began sharing my writing and the outpour of support, kind words and positive feedback has been overwhelming. The more I share my thoughts and various outlooks on life, the more I have been faced with the question: Why do you write? What motivates you? What inspires you? These are questions I have worked on perfecting over time but I have narrowed it down to this simple answer:

I write because I want people to know that they are not alone.

I began writing because in my darkest and deepest struggles, I found comfort in the words of people that I didn’t know. It was quotes, song lyrics and literature that got me through. There is something powerful about reading words and feeling as if in this great big world, someone else understands your pain. There is something unique about making our pain and sorrows into something beautiful.

2015 has been especially trying for me. I was tested in many different ways. My year started on a sad note. Just a mere six weeks later I found myself heartbroken. My heart was bruised, beaten and lost for so many reasons. I found strength as I do in many of my hard times. Then I was faced with losing someone I love very dearly to death. My spirit faded, my heart became fragile. Since then, I have been through phases of pure happiness, love and joy. I have also experienced grief, anger, and darkness.

Thank you to the people who lent me a shoulder to cry on, and to the ones who made me laugh so hard that my stomach ached the next day. Thank you to the people who challenged me. Thank you to those who forced me to learn hard lessons. Thank you to the friends who left me and the new people that came into my life and stayed. Thank you to the man who taught me what love was, and what it wasn’t. I have learned valuable lessons through the relationships with all of you.

I want to be known as a woman with a big heart, a strong mind and a beautiful soul. We are all responsible for taking opportunities given to us, but also planting the seed that will develop roots for our lives. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could all grow together? In sync with the lives of the ones we love? But since that isn’t the way it always works, it is nice to know that we are surrounded by people who support our growth as we support theirs.

As the year ends, I encourage all of you to reflect on this past year. To my family, friends, acquaintances and strangers – you are all wonderful, unique and full of love. I am thankful for everyone – the good and the bad; for they have contributed in shaping me into the woman I am today. I hope I am a contributing part of your growth too.

Wishing you all a happy, blessed and thankful holiday season.

All my love.

The Golden Rule

The Golden Rule –  “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Simply put, treat others as you would like to be treated. This is one of the oldest lessons in the book. A very matter-of-fact moral principle relating to a fundamental human nature that was taught to us in our early stages of life. But for some reason, our world is filled with individuals and groups that just do not seem to understand how matter of fact The Golden Rule truly is. Many times in my life I have been the victim of venomous words and actions. I too, have also been a perpetrator. We are in an era that makes forgetting The Golden Rule very easy. People hide behind computer screens and cell phones to verbally harass and abuse others. People are belittling one another through vicious words and name-calling. It’s hateful and it’s sick. They can be so tragically and traumatically cruel to strangers, friends and loved ones. I see too many people encouraging disparaging remarks and actions. I witness too many good people treating others with apparent disdain for them. We are all worthy of seeking respect and others are worthy of receiving it.

Words and actions are powerful. They can be so influential to the point that they change peoples’ lives – for the better and for the worse. I have seen both. I have experienced both. As a product of other peoples’ insecurities, I have been torn apart mentally through both words and actions. As an outcome? Well, I became who I am today. A woman I am proud to be. Not perfect, not near it but I am working to be the best version of myself that I can be and then I am going to strive to be even better than that. We as a generation need to spend more time building one another up, supporting each other on our paths to success and teaching our younger generations love and kindness rather than hate and cruelty.

I am not naive. I am not blind to the reasons why people are mean. But I do not want to live my life putting other people down. I do not like everyone. Matter of fact, my circle is small. But I will not lower myself to the levels of others who treat people with disrespect. This world can be hard and life is messy. Everyone truly is fighting their own battles. The way we can make a difference in this world is to help make others’ lives just a little bit easier, lighter, and happier. And if you cannot do that, keep your disrespect and blatant disregard for good to yourself. Indulge in kind words, big hearts and the potential of goodness that we have within ourselves. Inspire yourself to inspire others. It is an act so simple yet so immense. Mother Teresa said, “I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.”

Almost.

I think in life there are just some things that we are never going to make sense of. There are questions that will never have answers; opportunities that will lie dormant and passed by. Endless scenarios will manifest in our minds, but that’s what they will be – mere scenarios. Because at the end of the day our reality is just what it is, or almost was. We got a taste of something good, we skimmed the surface, we almost figured it out, but not quite.

“Almost” – it’s one of the saddest words in the English language. Something or someone being close enough but not quite all there. Something with infinite possibility but it fell short.

“Almost” – it’s such a peculiar word. Very nearly but not quite. It is a word shadowed with a feeling of hopelessness and a bit of emptiness. Very often it is something or someone close to our hearts. An opportunity missed.

I guess the almost moments in our lives happen because not everything is meant to work out the way we’d hoped. Maybe, just maybe, our almosts lead us to be better. We have to learn hard lessons and use them to succeed the next time around.

Our almost moments are great times for reflection. It is in times like this to get in touch with our souls. Our souls need to be cared for because without a healthy soul we cannot love or live to our fullest potentials. In your almost moments, take the time to rid the burdens that are disturbing your soul. Those burdens are the reasons why something wonderful remains an “almost something wonderful.” Do not be the reason that you are not genuinely happy. Stop allowing fear to turn your absolutes into almosts.

I love my almost moments. In such beautiful chaos, I can step back and see the purpose in all of it. Our almost moments become a part of us. They are our stories to tell. They are our defining moments. That alone, makes our almost moments some of the most special.

“He was almost in love. She was almost good for him. He almost stopped her. She almost waited. They almost made it.” 

 

Seek Your(selfish)

Many times in my life I have neglected my own happiness in fear that I would be hurting the feelings of someone I care about. I’ve done it with friends, family, and lovers. Not to fault of their own. My heart is big, my soul genuine. I love, and I love unconditionally. But there is truth in the saying, “It is both a blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply.” I am not great at being selfish. Most of the time that I have decided to put myself before others it resulted in me feeling torn down or regretful. However, being selfish is something that every individual should practice. It is healthy for our minds and souls to be aware and active in putting ourselves first. There is a thin line between being selfish for the good and just straight out being a selfish person. One lies within conscious decision making and positive outcomes. The other can be destructive to both oneself and your relationships due to the misguided interpretation of what being selfish means. This is not black and white. This is a balancing act. Put yourself first in situations or decisions that better your quality of life. By bettering your own life, you can then contribute to the lives of the ones around you. Build yourself up so you can build up others. Choose carefully who you put before your own happiness. Just because you do it for them does not mean that the gesture will be returned. There are no guarantees in this life but one thing I know for certain is that if you follow your intuition when it comes to making connections to souls aligned with yours, you will not be left disappointed. You will find that encouragement, inspiration and happiness come easy with these people because they understand the cycle. These are the ones that will contribute to the quality of your life.

Be whole alone. Make an investment in yourself. Then share your greatness with the world.